Saturday, January 17, 2009


I've not been ignoring you. I've been away and busy and haven't had internet access, and you haven't missed much. What have I been up to? Well, I took two of my kids and we went and stayed with Claire and her kids in a beachhouse she rents every year. It was fabulous. The kids all played together beautifully, Claire and I functioned extremely well as a domestic unit. In some ways having had this domestic familiarity it makes it easier to get to grips with the idea that Claire and I are never going to have a 'relationship'. We've now washed up dishes together, we've made beds together, we've gone shopping together for bread and milk.

One night about midnight my phone rang. I didn't pick it up, I just let it go to voicemail. It was my neighbor, Mary. When I say neighbor, she lives in the next street from me. She's in her mid20s, a tall dutch girl. We got chatting one day in the supermarket and we've become very friendly. I think I puzzle her; I'm the only man she's ever met who's not tried to fuck her and it seems to encourage her. Why don't I try to fuck her? I have a lot on my plate anyway, she's a friend and I think she's a bit young for me. I also like women a bit older and more depraved.

Anyway, she left me a voicemail. She said she needed an 'emergency fuck'. She'd been on a date and had really liked the guy, and following my advice hadn't slept with him (first date). So she'd come home drunk and horny and was hoping I was home. I love that.

When I listened to the message the next morning I heard all this. I liked it so much I let Claire hear it too.

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