Cathy comes out

You may recall in my last installment I'd told you about 'Cathy', and how we'd had a thing for a few months that was, for me at least, a real eye-opener. A revelation. We had extremely vanilla sex. Just plain face-to-face missionary position fucking. Nothing more exotic. And certainly none of the more unusual practices I like to introduce. But it was sensational. Then, I got a little bored. We remain friends, we catch up for coffee every couple of weeks, it's nice. I haven't fucked her since May, I think.

The relentlessly vanilla nature of it was mostly my doing - I liked the vanilla stuff so much with Cathy that I just decided to stick with it. She did ask me a couple of times what else I liked, and she knew that, for example, I have sex with men when it suits me. And I knew that she looked at my profile once in a while on the site where we'd met, and it was all there in back and white. My list of 'interests'.

Then one day I noticed she'd leaked across the semi-permeable barrier between the site I'd met her on and its sister site, which is very BDSM-themed. Her profile said something like "I stumbled upon this site, just looking around..". And then one day as I was fucking her she mumbled something which I swear was "I want to be your sub", but as I wasn't 100% sure (it might have been "I just hurt my thumb", or "let's go down the pub") I filed it away.

Over the last couple of months, since we've stopped fucking, we've started talking a bit more about what we both like. Especially after she saw through my I'm-seeing-someone bullshit. One of the things I've always liked about her is that she's articulate and quite direct, and as I've told her more about what I get up to, she's opened up.

She was indeed starting to have fantasies about being bossed around. I told her that what she was thinking about wasn't unusual - in my experience it's people who are used to being in charge all the time who most feel the need to have the tables turned once in a while. And she's a very tough cookie professionally and is used to being in charge and looking after herself. I told her about my own little journey... the first time I was tied up, how incredibly liberating it can be to not feel like you have to be doing something. You have no choice but to just lie there and enjoy it. (If you're curious, it was a handsome Canadian man I met in London once. He told me to get off the tube at Earls Court and to be standing outside with my hand touching the blue telephone box at 5pm one day. I did.)

She met one guy who she thought sounded great. They'd had lots of emails back and forth, quite steamy ones, and they'd talked about fantasies and whatnot. But he was a complete dud. Big strong handsome guy, and with all the right ideas.. but a little hesitant. And I know how that can ruin the mood.

Then last week she met another one. Masculine guy, 50ish. Very take-charge, and apparently exactly what she wanted. They had dinner, talked a bit about what they were looking for, she fessed up to never really having done anything like that before, then off to his hotel room where he (she said) had a lot of fun telling her what to do. He was nice about it, but definitely in charge. She loved it.

Afterwards they discussed fantasies. He said to her that he really wanted to see another guy fuck her. She said "I might know someone..."

I spoke to him on the phone today, nice guy. We're going to do this next week. I think what he wants isn't just me and him telling her what to do, it's something a bit more interesting. My sense of it (and he and I need to talk more) is that he'll be in charge, he'll be directing. I love this idea. He's sitting there in an armchair (it's an expensive hotel room, he's loaded). I come in, he presents her to me. He tells me what to do and watches. I will, of course, keep you posted on this.